I don’t know why sometimes we allow ourselves to be someone else. Maybe its escapism? But why would I want to escape from someone I feel so good with? Why would I want to act in a way that is contrary to everything He wants of me? I dissapoint myself more than anyone else in this. What don’t I have in this gift? Was I not redeemed as promised? Was I not provided for as promised? Was I not loved and supported as promised? It is too easy to forget and I am ashamed of my human-ness. I am not at rest until I am with You Lord. All of me belongs to You.
I stepped out for just a second; drowned by the din for but a second and I feel lost. I need you ALL the time. The little things that I once overlooked are not so little anymore. But living here I need Sanctuary in you. I am living in a fallen world and I am called to be so much more. Just being is no longer sufficient. Just surviving is not enough. There are no words to express all the turmoil but the tug at my heart is clear, and I choose to stop battling. I have no idea what it means but Lord, I surrender and wait. Only with You is there peace and grace; come Lord and hold this hand that I pulled away,but for a brief second. I need You Father to hold my hand always.
Nothing is my own. It’s all yours. I am overwhelmed by the sound of your voice to rise to perfection; to find your reflection in me. It truly is a tall order for simple me, but I will never find rest until I realize You in me. I can’t please anyone if I don’t please You first. Shield me from the harshness of the world. I barely grazed my knee and you jerk me away; the whiplash is painful but good. I am so grateful that I can find peace and rest in you. Jesus, without you nothing is worth it. It’s not about anything but you. Help me embrace your heart and love You as only You are worthy of ALL of me. I am waiting for You. And I know you are receiving me even as I write a little of my heart out. I don’t know what I have done, but i feel i need you more than I ever have. Jesus, thank you. Thank You for always rekindling the fire inside me. Be that Fire always LORD!
You Won’t Relent JESUS!