My Cat Stevens Experience, a haiku

sonorous and hypnotic

the Cat in early days

thank you internet

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Where am I now?

Life used to be a series of novelties, self-indulgences and mistakes.

Now in my thirties, it’s about patience, sacrifice and growth.

The challenge is making sure the patience is born out of passion; the sacrifice out of love for something greater and growth out of mistakes new and old.

Reminder to self –

  1. Don’t get too caught up with movies – they are simply a romp through someone else’s dream.
  2. Good music is all I need to make my own dreams.
  3. Sufjan Stevens and David Gray help me slip through the fold of the mundane.
  4. Keep singing, for God and myself.
  5. Live, breathe, love whatever is in front of you.

My Vujicic Experience

Manipulative, deceitful, exploitative… the event organisers who had capitalized on the image of it’s key note speaker, were pushing me to the brink of patience. They denied us an itinerary and refused to reveal when he would appear. The conference itself was a sham; conmen blatantly hawked their own business interests to attendees who had paid good money to absorb some of their business savvy and “wisdom”. The number of I’s and me’s flying from their lips did not seem to embarrass them; they seemed shameless of their self promotion and get rich schemes.

The person I had signed on to see was Nick Vujicic. As the days slipped out of my hands because if their lack of integrity and openness, I grew frustrated. I was forced to sit through speakers in fancy suits who said so little and yet expected such loud applause. “Do you want to get rich? Brand yourself! Write a book! Start a Webinar! You don’t have to know anything to teach people something! Sign up for my programme and I will show you how! Sign now! Those sitting, why aren’t you signing up? You don’t know what you’re missing!”

My soul writhed in this temple of mammon. I looked around. For three days, 4 thousand people were opening their hearts and souls to this – and they loved it.

Then, finally, it was time. Someone carried a small man and placed him onto a table. People came to take pictures and got so excited that they had to be repeatedly told to take their seats. They knew there was something special about this man. He had no limbs, but he had more substance than any other person who had come onstage. Everything in me rejoiced when he began speaking. He spoke of hope, love, joy, purpose, valuing yourself – such nourishment after the vacuum I had been in. He declared his faith in Jesus, and his belief in eternity and heaven for all to hear. And I understood. Nothing can quench the power of God and his will. God uses the willing to carry a bulb into the world; then He turns it on. Nick may have no hands, but he carries a chandelier of floodlights.

Thankful I got to hear from this inspiring man of God. Thankful for the new perspective on my petty self-esteem issues. Thankful to have witnessed Jesus shared so simply, boldly, yet so full of love and gentleness. Thankful to have witnessed the grace and love of God for the multitude.

My takeaway: I am beautiful, I have a bulb in my hand and I’m hooked up to an everlasting power source.

Dear Jesus,

I want to hear your voice even when I’m asleep.

I want to awake from the illusion of you…

I want to feel your hand on my back, burning and tingling and reassuring me.

I want to see your feet, inches away from mine.

I lay my heavy head on your chest.

I want to hear your heartbeat and let my own heart be warmed as it beats in time with yours.

I reach out to take your hand and it’s right there, firm and gentle.

I want to sense your great love for me as I inhale your fragrance.

Then, I look up and see your eyes of fire. Let it catch.

Set my eyes ablaze. Let my mind be consumed. My heart is erupting in holy fire. Fire! Fire! Fire!

And we dance, in flames.

I WAS HERE

 

I was here… simple, elegant yet powerful. What is it about this song that empowers, inspires and brings the soul to the surface?

Parts of the lyrics that strike me the most:

I wanna leave my footprints on the sands of time

Know there was something that, meant something that I left behind
When I leave this world, I’ll leave no regrets
Leave something to remember, so they won’t forget

I was here
I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I’ve done everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here

I want to say I lived each day, until I died
And know that I meant something in, somebody’s life
The hearts I have touched, will be the proof that I lived
That I made a difference, and this world will see

I was here
I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I’ve done everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know

Disclaimer: song, video, lyrics, obviously not mine.